Key Takeaways
- Discover different symptoms and causes of sexual anxiety
- Learn how to overcome sexual performance anxiety
- Put anti-anxiety practices to use in the bedroom and beyond
Picture this: you’ve waited for so long, and finally, it’s time to get romantic with a new partner. The setting is perfect. The timing is right. You want to take things to the next level. But all of a sudden, anxiety floods your system, and you simply can’t perform the way you wanted to.
Sound familiar? If so, you may suffer from sexual anxiety, and it’s more common than you might think. It’s estimated that up to 25% of men and 16% of women can be affected by sexual performance anxiety (source), an emotional or psychological response that can physically hinder your sex life in a negative way.
Why Does Sex Anxiety Happen?
There are so many reasons why a person might experience sexual performance anxiety.
Sex performance anxiety can happen at any time, like on the tenth date, during a random hookup, or even in long, committed relationships. You may have been sexually confident your whole life, and then suddenly, one day, or with a new partner, everything can change.
The bottom line is, sex anxiety isn’t your fault and can be caused by a number of factors. So what can you do to overcome this sometimes embarrassing and frustrating problem? Read on to find out how different methods and sexual aids like adult toys for couples can help you achieve the sensual confidence you crave.
Recognizing Sexual Anxiety
Most often, the root of someone’s sexual performance anxiety can be discovered through self-reflection. There could be something in your environment that is making it hard to get hard, or regular life stressors that send your libido crashing. Dig deep and ask yourself if these two common challenges might be the root of your sexual anxiety.
- Mental or Emotional Challenges: A stressful job, a sick family member, financial issues, past traumas, and more can all affect your sex drive.
- Health or Physical Issues: Illness, injury, dysfunction, or other physical symptoms can definitely cause sexual performance anxiety.
Causes of sex anxiety can come from a variety of places, including underlying health issues, low self-esteem, or relationship dissatisfaction. When you are honest with yourself and seek out the root of your sexual anxiety, it’s easier to enjoy intimate time with your partner and play with unique adult toys again.
Overcoming Sexual Performance Anxiety
Once you are able to identify the root cause of your sexual anxiety, overcoming your fears and blocked libido can begin. Here are a few relaxation and sex-positive methods to help you get started at home:
- Relaxation Techniques: Deep breathing, massage, or even masturbation with sex toy vibrators or a vibrating male stroker can help naturally relieve tension.
- Focus and Mindfulness Meditation: Remember not to push or pressure yourself to orgasm during sex. Stay in the moment and make intimacy over orgasm the goal.
- Communication: Talk to your partner and tell them if you’re having any sexual performance anxiety surrounding certain acts, or if you need more intimacy, before or after care, or other adjustments.
Ultimately, some sexual issues can’t be worked out in the bedroom, so be sure to consult a professional if problems persist.
Sex Anxiety in Men and Women
While many issues that affect performance can affect both men and women, there are individual issues that can hinder men and women differently as well. There’s no one right approach to dealing with sexual anxiety, so trying out different methods and practices can be helpful.
Sex anxiety in men can look like premature ejaculation or an inability to maintain an erection. Experiment with anal toys for men to see if prostate massage can help maintain an erection. If premature ejaculation is causing sexual performance anxiety, test your stamina with unique adult toys designed to help practice edging and delaying ejaculation.
For women, sometimes the pressure to orgasm during penetrative sex can cause mental and physical blocks. Try using a clit vibrator during foreplay or intercourse to help encourage orgasm and take the performance pressure off.
Making Sex Fun and Enjoyable
When stress is introduced into the bedroom, your body can be flooded with adrenaline, making relaxation and arousal difficult or downright impossible. Finding ways to take the pressure off of performance can be helpful, and being playful with your partner is a fun and easy way to combat sexual anxiety.
Try teasing each other with fun sex toys for couples, costumes, props, or games designed to lighten the mood. However, be sure to communicate with your partner before trying certain toys, like anal vibrators or a giant dildo, to make sure that they are comfortable. Being playful without communication or consent can undo all of the work you might have done to combat your or your partner’s sexual performance anxiety.
Practice Makes Perfect
Once you have identified the source of your sex anxiety and made modifications to your lifestyle, relationship, and environment, it’s time to do the work. Like all good things, practice makes perfect, so be sure to make time for romance with your partner. If you feel your sexual anxiety returning, make relaxation and enjoyment a priority, or reassess the way you’re approaching intimate time.
If you’re tired of feeling insecure or anxious about sex and want to do something about it, now’s the time to take matters into your own hands. Schedule time for romance, make sex a priority, and reduce as many stressors as you can, or at the very least, leave those stressors out of the bedroom. If you’re ready to tackle your sexual performance anxiety in a comfortable, accessible way, visit the VSekreets online sex shop to discover something new for you or your partner.
