How Often Do Couples Really Have Sex? A Look at the Data

Woman and man embracing in bed

Key Takeaways

  • Sex frequency statistics can vary from couple to couple.
  • How often couples have sex isn’t always as important as the quality of sex. 
  • Mismatched libidos and health problems can be reasons for reduced sex frequency. 
  • Communication and connection can help couples with dead bedroom issues. 

For some people, frequency of intimacy is important, while others view quality over quantity. There are so many variables for how often couples have sex, from age and health issues to individual drive. While there’s no single answer to the average sex frequency for couples, there are a few sex frequency statistics that inquiring minds can take into account. 

There are so many factors in how often couples are or are not getting it on. It’s not uncommon in relationships for partners to have mismatched libidos, meaning that sex drive and frequency aren’t in sync. While mismatched libidos can be frustrating, differing sex drives aren’t always a reason to call it quits. Read on and see how you can improve your own sex frequency statistics with conversation, contemplation, and maybe even a clit vibrator

How Often Do Married Couples Have Sex?

Man and woman in a shower

According to a 2012 survey, around 60% of married men and women reported engaging in sex about once a week. For many couples, that average sex frequency is just right and works with their needs and lifestyles. However, some couples experience different libido levels, which can be a frustrating and isolating experience. 

Some things that can affect how often couples have sex include:

  • Demanding family and childcare expectations. 
  • Health problems, illness, or physical limitations. 
  • Age or changes in hormones.
  • Stress, financial pressures, or job-related issues. 
  • Underlying relationship or marital conflicts. 

If you are truly concerned about your sex frequency statistics, talk to your partner and see how they feel. You can even consider booking an appointment with a sex therapist to get an objective point of view. Often, the root cause of the problem with infrequent sex is simple to resolve, and tweaking a few things could be the magic ticket to getting you and your partner back in the sack again. 

Masturbation and Average Sex Frequency

You love your partner, but their mismatched sex drive doesn’t mean you both have to abstain. Masturbation with a blowjob toy, cock stroker, or silicone masturbators can help take the edge off behind the scenes. Adult toys can be a part of how often couples have sex, and when the time is right, can even be used together with your partner. 

Women can also rely on masturbation with clit massagers or sex toy vibrators during times of low libido to help with arousal. Fluctuations in hormones during post-natal periods or during perimenopause and menopause can lower sex drive and tank a couple’s average sex frequency. These biological processes are common, normal, and if handled with care, can be overcome so you and your partner are enjoying the kind of sex you want to have again. 

Waking Up a Dead Bedroom

Couple in white bed with feet sticking out

Location, location, location. One thing affecting how often couples have sex is a lack of romantic space. Making sure that your bedroom is a sanctuary and is designed for romance is important for setting the tone. Clear your bedroom of clutter, ensure your bed is comfortable with fresh sheets, light a candle, play some music, and you’re off on the right foot. 

The symptoms of a dead bedroom go further than skin-deep, though, and may skew most sex frequency statistics. Once you’ve done the emotional work, you and your partner can address any health or stress issues and realize that something has to change. Even if you’ve done everything you can, sometimes how often couples have sex boils down to a need for excitement. One surefire way to wake up a dead bedroom is to get playful with your partner again through the use of silicone sex toys

Marriage is a wonderful, long-term commitment, but like everything else, a robust sex life between spouses requires work. Average sex frequency won’t correct itself, as all relationships require attention, enthusiasm, and care. Performing the same way in bed every time can be comforting, but also boring. Mix things up with fun sex toys for couples.  

Making Sex Fun Again

Man with woman holding sex toy.

No one likes to feel as though sex is a chore. One of the simplest ways to encourage how often couples have sex is by making intercourse fun again. With his and hers adult toys, not only can you help improve a low libido, but you and your partner can explore and learn new things about each other. Enjoying unique sex toys together is an excellent way to beat those sex frequency statistics, deepen your connection, and strengthen the bond between partners while enjoying an orgasmic release. 

Not sure what your partner would like? Open a bottle of wine, make it a date night, and visit an online sex shop together to learn about each other’s preferences. Discover body-safe sex toys perfect for beginners, or spice things up with unique anal toys for him and her. You might be surprised to see your average sex frequency instantly increase with just a few clicks. 
If you find yourself thinking about how often couples have sex, and find that you’re not satisfied with the frequency of intimacy in your own life, silicone sex toys could be the solution. If you’re looking to buy adult sex toys online, browse VSekreets’ selection of premium, high-quality adult toys and make dead bedrooms a thing of the past.

Meet the Author

VSekreets has been an online adult toys store for both men and women for over a decade and an expert in their industry. Selling high-tech adult toys at affordable prices, they excel at designing durable products made of fine, silicone materials with modern construction and even created patented molds for their products. As a leader in their industry, they offer educational advice on sexual wellness and tips for intimate experiences.